Often, we focus on the upper age limits of getting married but what about the lower limits? Some months ago, it was reported that 19 years old Miley Cyrus had become engaged to Liam Hemsworth, her off-and-on boyfriend of three years. Some of the chatter over the engagement was over her age. Her fiance is not that much older, he's 22. A lot of commentators felt they were just too young, and Miley being a teenager was the key to their argument.
Since the engagement, Miley has seemed to bear out those who felt she was too immature to even think of marriage. Some of them insist that the fact she has cut her hair twice, spontaneously, without reason and in wacky styles is a measure of her age. She is also prone to rants on twitter including sharing about the problems she's having in the relationship. The latter has led to rumors Miley and Liam are about to break up.
At first, I was on the side of the couple. They had been dating 3 years, the guy looked quite calm and mature, and maybe Miley had got over her tempestous years trying to shed the Hannah Montana cloak. Now I am beginning to wonder.
Bukky Apampa blogged recently on being too young to get married,
The story was that two 19 year olds who had been dating since they were 17 decided to get married, they’re both Christians and believe they should not have sex before marriage, they have both managed to keep themselves this way in their 2 years of dating and now they are struggling to continue to do so, hence they want to get married as Paul admonished in the bible. To be clear, their sole reason to want to get married is not just to have sex, they have dated for a while and decided they want to spend the rest of their lives together.
They informed their parents and as expected, the parents kicked off saying no way, they are yet to finish school, get a job, get their own place e.t.c. Majority of the people agreed with the parents...
Most of the comments on that post agreed with the parents too that the couple were too young to get married. Some people however said they would agree with the 19 year olds to get married if they could support themselves financially. In Miley and Liam Hemsworth's case, of course they are both independently wealthy, maybe even more than their parents. So it would be dangerous to base it only on being able to provide.
I really do not think it's about age, no matter the example Miley Cyrus sets :). In a follow up post on bukky's blog, where she talked about the negative view of marriage as so burdensome and draining, pointing out that marriage can be enjoyable and happy if prepared for, I agreed with her noting that;
I will support anyone of 19 to get married but I will certainly talk to them to know what their vision of the marriage is and ask them to get pre-marital counselling. It is not about age but about maturity and ability to live and work/walk together with another person.
So what's your take? Is 16 too young to get married? What about 19 and 21? Maybe people should just wait till they are 25? Should the age be different for men and women?