To be Fair - The Other Side of the Ogochukwu Story

I was one of the people who commented on the Onuchukwu's story on my blog and I feel it is only fair to also bring the other side. This counter story is written by a named lawyer and so can be said to be more trustworthy than the other which was written by an anonymous confidante. From this new perspective, the initial story may have come because Ogochukwu's family have some issues with her husband.

The rebuttal was written by Barr. Mrs Nnenna Okafor (PHD). Is she saying the truth? I do not know. She says she lived with the couple for four years and was closer to both than the original writer. Read and make up your own mind.

1. Ogochukwu's lung problem started before her marriage to Kevin on December 12, 2000. But due to the love Kevin had for his wife, he proceeded with the wedding despite her pre-existing medical conditions. She was moved to UNTH after 2 weeks of marriage and a chest tube was used to draw off fluid from her lungs. The UNTH doctor then advised that she should be flown to Washington DC otherwise, she would die. Kevin and his family swung into action gathering money to save Ogochukwu life.

2. Kevin, his family and friends of Kevin supported Ogochukwu throughout her medical history. The first N15M that was raised for her to travel to Washington DC for surgery came from Kevin, his eldest brother, the Onuchukwu family and Kevin's friends at ExxonMobil. It was at the Washington DC hospital, that Ogochukwu was diagnosed in 2001 as having Endometrioses – Fluid in the lungs. She had surgeries in more than 5 hospitals across the World – South Africa, Washington DC, Houston TX, London, etc. While Ogochukwu was abroad and uptil her death, her 76 year old mother-inlaw was praying for and contributing on her behalf towards her membership of church groups in Ihiala amongst other women organization levies in the village. She had bought clothes for her, which Ogochukwu showed to me at one time. So, the reports from the Author that she was not received by Kevin's mother and sister-in-law are all fabricated lies and did not emanate from Ogochukwu.

3. There was no pressure from Kevin's family for children or for Kevin to remarry (which some people would have done) as Kevin's family members are Christians and believe in the will of God. In 2002 when Ogochukwu returned from the hospital, Kevin's mother and elder brother were there to receive Ogochukwu in Lagos They advised her to know that the priority then was her health and that when her health was normalized, God will give her and Kevin their own children someday. So the Author's claim of being under pressure for children is false as well as malicious.

4. Kevin is a caring and loving husband, a very responsible young man with integrity. For his love and care to his wife, he made sure that he was with Ogochukwu wherever he went for work assignments. Also, due to Ogochukwu's health, he ensured that Ogochukwu had Nannies doing everything for her and provided a driver for Ogochukwu. So the statement from the Author that Kevin tied his sick wife with rope and used belt on her is baseless and fabricated lies to sway the innocent readers and bloggers to believing them and tarnishing the image of Ogochukwu and Kevin.

5. Kevin usually paid his wife Ogochukwu monthly salary in addition to paying the Nannies and driver. He spent an average of N10M / year for his wife's lungs problem.

6. Kevin usually supported Ogochukwu's sisters and her brother financially. In some instance, her sisters, Mrs. Uzoamaka Otegbulu (working in INEC) and her other sister (Mrs Ngozi Ijere in Oyibo Port Harcourt) had so much influence in their marriage. Kevin curtailed the excesses of Mrs Ngozi Ijere in the early part of their marriage as she was interfering in the affairs of their marriage through calls and instructions to both of them on what to do. As for Uzoamaka, she was difficult to handle and she deceived Ogochukwu till death. She was the one that made her to undergo surgery, connived and signed the consent letter when her husband, Kevin advised otherwise and Ogochukwu died in her laps.

7. Ogochukwu is the next of kin to Kevin and not Kevin's brother. There are documents to this effect. So the author's fabrications that Kevin elder brother was next of kin is false.

8. Ogochukwu was always appreciative of Kevin, his brother and her mother-in-law and their support to her throughout her ill health running from one country to the other. Her mother-in-law usually put in for mass service for Ogochukwu for 6 years. Abah! How can the author turn the story around to favor their wicked plan that has failed!.

9. Kevin is a responsible man, with integrity and has respect for women and will never call his wife barren because he believed that his wife will bear children. He stood by her all the years till God answered their prayers with the blessing of 2 beautiful children – a son and daughter. I remember in 2006 when Kevin told me that he knew the wife would one day have children and that he will never get disturbed because his family is not disturbed, rather some friends were asking if the sickness of his wife had not ended?. So I do not understand where the author got her information and data from as it was not from Ogochukwu.

10. Between years 2000 to 2006, Ogochukwu went to various specialist hospitals and other hospitals around the world to remove fluid in her lungs – Washington DC, Houston TX, South Africa, and London. So, she had 5 different surgeries in 6 years for endometriosis. In 2007 she had the 6th surgery during the birth of their son in USA. Also, in 2010, she had her daughter through the 7th surgery in USA. During the surgical procedure to bring out her daughter, Ogochukwu passed out and it was with God's intervention that her heart kicked in after some minutes. The entire hospital erupted with joy. Before Ogochukwu was discharged, her Doctor (in the presence of her brother, Anthony Onugu of Dover, Delaware) advised that she should never carryout surgery any more as her body is like "vegetable" and it would be difficult to pull through after another surgery. The doctor indicated that the fluid in her lungs would stop by the time she gets to menopause. Both Kevin and Ogochukwu were happy, and Ogochukwu exclaimed that both of them were accomplished with the birth of a son and a daughter. So the Author's websites are full of disjointed and false stories.

11. In 2001 while Ogochukwu was undergoing surgical recovery, she stayed in her brother's house (Anthony Onugu, then in Washington DC). As a bachelor, her brother felt inconvenienced by Ogochukwu's presence in his house. So, by the time Ogochukwu's 1-94 expired, Anthony (Ogochukwu brother) lied to Ogochukwu that he has filed an extension of stay with the Immigration services. Ogochukwu only found out that her brother did not submit her application when she was stopped by immigration from entering the USA in 2003. The Author's write up that it was their son medical that impacted Ogochukwu immigration issue is another lie. As the issue was in 2001 while their son was born in 2007.

12. Kevin was helped by the then ExxonMobil Management who intervened with the American Embassy in Lagos and that was how Ogochukwu got another US visa for a medical follow-up to resolve her endometriosis problem.

13. There was a time Ogochukwu and Kevin went to the hospital in Nigeria and the Doctor advised that the only cure to stop fluid in Ogochukwu lungs was to remove her ovaries. Her husband was not in support as he believed that Ogochukwu will bear children someday. That dream was achieved by both of them.

You can read the rest of the write-up on the new blog.

At this stage, I don't know what to believe. I am reminded of what I said in the post about Don Jazzy and Dbanj. Only the main parties in broken relationships can say the truth, the rest is people around them trying to make sense of the situation through their own worldview. I still stand by my call on women in abusive relationships to seek help and get external support (sometimes, even the abusive party needs help too) or leave the toxic environment. There is hope only while LIFE remains.